(no subject)

[purplerabbit]

I have been frequently (and particularly recently) shocked at the number of married people who seem to make major life decisions without first having the agreement (or sometimes even input) of their spouse(s). Or feel justified in withholding important information from their spouse(s). I don't understand how they can even begin to justify such behavior.

Two sections from our family Commitment Agreement include:

We make all major decisions by consensus. .... Major decisions include financial, legal, medical, parenting, time managment, relationships, and household resources.

We have a commitment to honesty including full disclosure to each other. We do not withhold important information from each other. We will not make promises to other people that include lying to or lies of omission from each other.

So I have some questions for my friends here:

1. If you are in a committed relationship, are these provisions part of your marriage/commitment agreement? Why or why not?


2. If you are not in a currently in a committed relationship, would these be part of an agreement you would make? Why or why not?


3. If you and your committed partner have not discussed the details of what your commitment to each other entails, why or why not?

Please keep your comments civil. I really want to hear how folks deal with these issues.

Comments

[crankles.livejournal.com]

We don't have a contract written out like that, but we have promised each of the above to each other, and meant it. This is mostly because we have watched people's relationships (including our own past relationships) deteriorate due to lack of communication and lack of honesty.

Our upcoming marriage vows will be specific on honesty and ommunication.