purplerabbit (
purplerabbit) wrote2007-05-14 02:29 pm
Mother's Day Understandings
You ever notice how one person epiphany is another person's "duh?"
My Mother's Day was difficult on a number of levels. It usually is but this one was particularly complex and brought with it a number of realizations about myself. Some of which were part of the conversation we had on Fibromyalgia, after watching the film. But others were about what I and my partners want from each other.
And this is what I have come to realize the next day:
This sounds duh, but it has been tearing me apart of years. I want to make the world a safe place for those I love. But my inability to protect my son has nearly driven me insane.
So the second half of this epiphany:
My Mother's Day was difficult on a number of levels. It usually is but this one was particularly complex and brought with it a number of realizations about myself. Some of which were part of the conversation we had on Fibromyalgia, after watching the film. But others were about what I and my partners want from each other.
And this is what I have come to realize the next day:
- There is only one person in the world who has the legitimate right to expect me to make the world safe for them - my son.
- I am incapable of protecting my son or anyone else I love from all harm.
This sounds duh, but it has been tearing me apart of years. I want to make the world a safe place for those I love. But my inability to protect my son has nearly driven me insane.
So the second half of this epiphany:
- I do not have the power to make this world a safe place for anyone, not my son or myself. I never had. My mama did not have the power to protect me either. No one has it.
- We can only be there to support each other through it. My role as someone who loves is to help those I love in dealing with the world in which we actually live.

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