Missing

[purplerabbit]

I haven't read this LJ in a month.

I read my writing one everyday. Since I post new fiction several times a week. And read and comment on other people's fiction.

But when I try to log on to the one that has my friends, that talks about real life. I freeze up. I feel sick.

Tonight I did.

I was only able to make it back a week, skimming, before the depression overwhelmed me.

I know what part of it is. A big part of it.

I feel like life passes my by while I sit here.

My illness makes me a spectator unable to do what most people do. Unable to do what I used to do.

So I would rather immerse myself in the fictional words I create.

There I am still a participant. There I still feel alive.